Today is the first day of my new life!

Or is the the last day of my old life? I don't think either is accurate, because my "old" life ended back when I found out that I was pregnant and my "new" life is still being defined. And trust me, I'm as surprised as anyone to find out how things are turning out!

In honor of my last day of work, of course I had to push things to the limit and stay up most of the night to get things wrapped up. I never had a chance to go into the office to pack up my desk because of Zachary (it's amazing how hard it is to get anything done when you have a baby who 1. has a meltdown if he doesn't get his naps; 2. refuses to nap anywhere but in his crib; 3. eats solid meals twice a day, which must be timed in order to not interfere with nursing; and 4. is no longer content to hang out by himself). So last night, I went into the office in the middle of the night to make my last free latte and pack up my desk. I made it home at 2:30 AM, giving me just enough time to change, crawl into bed, and barely fall asleep before getting up at 3:15 AM to nurse Zachary.

So I've packed up my desk, cleared off my laptop, and moved all of my work clothes to the back of the closet. Now what? Now that I'm an official SAHM, am I going to turn into Polly Homemaker, like the picture above? I seriously doubt it. Even though I have (somewhat uncharacteristically) decided to step off the career track for a while in order to focus on being a mom, I am still the same person. I may not be tracking projects or implementing systems, but I'm probably going to find some reason to put together a few spreadsheets or do a bit of coding. Because, contrary to what a sane person may think, that is fun for me.

I've been thinking about the various nicknames that I've received at work over the years. Never have I been dubbed "Mom" or "Mother Hen" or "Den Mother" or anything nurturing and maternal like that*. No, I'm "Matrix Queen", "Super Devil's Advocate", "Rock of Skepticism", "Gattaca", and "Pays Very Close Attention to Detail (aka Anal Retentive)", to name a few. And I have to admit, one of the best compliments I've received from a superior was, "B*tch suits you -- you should do it more often."

So no, as much as I adore my baby and love being a mom, I don't think I have it in me to become June Cleaver. My version of SAHM is going to be much closer to the following image, courtesy of my neighborhood mommy networking group. Instead of "Hi Honey", I tend more towards "Hiiii-YA!"

*Actually, I do have one nickname that could be construed as being nurturing: "Coach". But it wasn't given to me in the context of anything remotely maternal.